House hunt

In the past three weeks, we've almost bought a house. Twice.

Hindsight already sums up both of these situations as ridiculous but I'm writing this blog confession because years from now, when I go back and read about our lives in this season, I want to remember this. I want to remember how silly we were and how kind God is. And I want to laugh really hard at our foolishness. Even more than we are laughing now.

The first house was… expensive. I won't say how expensive because that's completely subjective, but for us, it was stupid expensive. We made the mistake of going to look at it in the first place, and of course we loved it. Why wouldn't we? It was light years nicer than the ones we had been looking at. And it was for-sale-by-owner. So we decided to make an offer.

Fortunately, God had the good sense to put a particular friend in our lives who came to look at the house with us on our second go-'round and then who proceeded to ask us some pointed questions. And we quickly realized that oops, making an offer was not a wise decision. So we called the sellers back and told them we'd changed our minds.

The next morning we woke up, looked at each other, and just shook our heads. What were we thinking?

Fast-forward to this week. We stumbled upon a great house that felt so homey. It was much less expensive than our previous find, located in a fabulous neighborhood, near great schools, and it had been completely redone. Our realtor was amazed that it was still on the market. This had to be a gift from God! But it was by no means cheap. And once again, we got caught up in the moment, in the thought of our family there, cooking in the kitchen, hosting friends in the living room full of natural light. It was just so homey.

Nevermind that it was in a part of town that we'd previously had zero desire to live in or that it was at the very top of our price range. Nevermind that I didn't particularly care for the backyard, an aspect I'd ranked as particularly important in our search. How could we pass up this opportunity? So we stayed up until 10 p.m. crafting an offer with our realtor.

When we got their counter-offer the next day, we were initially indignant. We were expecting this to be a negotiation process, and they had budged maybe a millimeter in our direction. We wisely decided to sleep on it before making any decisions, and hallelujah for that decision. When we awakened the next morning, we both had the distinct feeling that our uneasiness was actually the Lord putting on some brakes. "Less expensive" does not equal "affordable," as it turns out. At least, not affordable in the way we want to live our lives with the financial priorities that we have.

At church this morning, during worship, we both spent considerable time praying and then just being quiet before God, waiting to see what He was speaking to our hearts. And what He spoke to my heart was something deep and true and I immediately knew that it was His voice. I told Gib, and he agreed that he felt the same thing. And then our pastor opened his mouth to preach, and the message was identical to what we both felt we'd heard God saying directly to us just a few minutes earlier. We just looked at each other and laughed. I think He wanted to make sure that we got the message loud and clear.

Suffice it to say that we've taken our house hunting in a different direction. Our realtor probably thinks we are nuts. Our parents might think we are a little nuts, too. But we have a new clarity and peace that we didn't have before.

Thank you, God, that not only do you open doors in life but you also close them abruptly and wisely. Thank you, God, that you control the brake pedal of our lives. And thank you, most of all, that despite our foolish and rash decision-making, you love us enough to pursue our hearts and our attention and turn it back to Yourself.